Oscars, schmoscars

Chilled out from a long Oscar nominations day and watched A Prophet. I recommend.

I am not cut out for this

Rough day at work. I am not cut out for the fast-paced google/trending-chasing world.

At a staff meeting today we were told we need to work faster. We need to answer our #1 boss's emails faster. 20 minutes is not acceptable. When we get e-mails from the Big Boss we need to drop whatever we're doing, answer her and do what she wants.

I also found out this week that the Big Boss was not happy to one of my replies to her emails. I work my ass off and that's what I'm known for with her. I said I mostly read the N.Y. Times' art section and didn't see the front page story about the "children's author that inspired the movie Babe's" death.

On Saturday night, formally "on-call" hours have turned into 911s every time a missive rolls down from the Palisades; we're expected to jump like lapdogs once the Huffington Post has posted that Aretha Franklin wants Halle Berry to play her in a biopic.

This is not my pace.

I was told I needed to "play the game" better and more, i.e., I need to appear more enthusiastic through emails in order to sound like I'm doing my job. The fact that I'm online from 8:30am to 10:30pm on Saturdays is not proof enough.

Deep breaths. Focus. Remember this is not the goal. Working at a university is the goal. Getting a Master's is a goal.

I will never ever deal with people the way the Big Boss deals with us. The hierarchical communication is a morale buster.

My old employers were not perfect but they all knew our names, had lunch with us, made sure we were all part of the holiday celebration. The top guy in the company was not above dining with the workers. This is not the case in The Hollywood Reporter's editorial department.

Jan. 1. 2011

Packed up armoire (sp?) for move to new apartment tomorrow. There is an 80% chance of rain. With apartment's white carpets, that's a 99% chance of dirty.

True Grit was alright. Don't think anyone would care about it if it wasn't a Coen Brothers movie. A Serious Man was better. No County For Old Men worse.

New Year's Day hike to Paseo Miramar in the Palisades. We made good time. Warmed up quickly.

Artsy or Awful?

I can't help it. I like seeing films even though I've read/heard bad things about them. I have to see it for myself in order to give a proper opinion, especially if its from one of the artsy directors I like or know.

With that in mind, I watched Lars Von Trier's Antichrist tonight. It was absolutely ridiculous. There was shot of a thrusting penis within the first five minutes of the film. Doesn't that qualify as pornography? It was not a flaccid penis.

It was slow going from the beginning, with or without Willem Dafoe's clenching butt. The film was tolerable until the characters played by Dafoe and Charlotte Gainsbourg head to the woods to confront her "fears." He's her therapist husband, their kid fell out of a window, she flushes her meds down the toilet, and he takes her to the remote cabin that she keeps having nightmares about.

While out in the secluded forest, we see what looked like a deer pooping out a newborn deer: it runs around with this bloody thing hanging out of its butt. There's also a bird eating another baby bird that feel out of a tree.

It's slower going in the forest until the wife snaps and starts inflicting pain on her husband and herself. She knocks him out by throwing a block on his privates. She drills a hole in his leg and attaches some kind of circular weight to it. She, um, man-handles his man stick which gushes blood instead of semen (which makes a little sense since she did just crush his man parts). She mutilates her lady parts with scissors.

A deer, a fox and a big bird enter their cabin at some point.

There was no point.

Lars von Trier only makes films about tortured women. They hate themselves. They inflict pain upon themselves. Antichrist was his most literal exploration of this theme.

No wonder people booed the movie in Cannes: it was awful, not art.

time for a stiff drink

Just poured myself a still drink. Feeling anxious and frustrated. Saturdays are my longest work days. I get in at 8:30am and work til 4:30. Then I'm on call the rest of the night. It's dark by 5 so I wasn't able to squeeze in a run. There's a story coming in tonight for work so I have to dutifully be near the computer.

Also frustrated that they won't switch me to a Mon-Fri schedule. We have a major project launching Tuesday morning that still needs lots of work but I can't help with it anymore. Have to pass it on to already overworked people midstream. I would be much more effective on Monday than I am on Saturday.

Crunch time

Sixteen days until the wedding and I am feeling angry, disorganized, almost desperate. For a supposed low budget wedding, we are doing too much ourselves the day of the event.

chris is picking up alcohol and ice, setting up chairs for the ceremony, giving up his bed to his best man, and who knows what else. I'm organizing friends to help decorate day of so that I can concentrate on looking and feeling good.

I am regretting not having the ceremony near my mom's house. I have family here that would help with it all. but with the events up in L.A., there really isn't time for the family to help and get to the wedding on time. Very frustrating.

Chris is trying to do all himself. I just learned he's planning on breaking down the chairs and storing them in his garage after the ceremony. When does he plan on doing that? After the ceremony we're taking pictures and then to the reception. I'm getting angry already. It would have been so much easier and cheaper to do a destination wedding where other people take care of it.

Our catering will not adjust our price even though we have 30 fewer guests than expected. The venue closes off half of the center because of noise issues at 10pm.

Oh yeah, and my house was broken into this weekend and my room ransacked. Still picking up from that.

Grrrrrr

Missions: Accomplished

We are eight weeks out from the wedding. Definitely crunch time. Lots to do.

Chris and I were in unbelievable form on Sunday. After our morning exercises (10 mile run for him, a tough yoga class for me) and some errands, we had lunch at Cafe Laurent in Culver City (actually breakfast, as they don't serve lunch on Sundays) and proceeded to be wedding maniacs.

First stop, Men's Warehouse where Chris got sized and picked tuxes for his groomsmen. I mentioned that Chris' suits are usually too big and our salesman assured us it would fit him perfectly. Chris thinks he pulled the measuring tape too tight but we'll see when the tux comes in. Wedding party tuxes? Check!

We had a couple of hours to kill before a cake tasting appointment and decided to stop by the Fox Hills mall to look at wedding bands. Contrary to my instincts, we ended up spending an hour at a jewelry kiosk inside the mall. The woman was using the hard sell but we found nice, stylish, simple rings at a decent price. Wedding rings? Double check!

Last but not least, cake tasting. Five flavors, two people = 2 1/2 cupcakes each. We couldn't pick one so we picked three. Black forest, white cake with fruit, red velvet...everyone will be happy.

I've been modeling my wedding band to everyone I see. I really like it.

Eight weeks. Still need photographer, transportation, a rehearsal dinner location, presents for wedding party, undergarments, shoes, invitations, etc.